I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
