it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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