Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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