I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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