Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize