I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
