i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
