he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
i think my cat just said my name.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
