I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Drake has all the answers
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
