youre lurking in front of me
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Less talking, more tequila
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
