positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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