that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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