I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
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