Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
