They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
