Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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