i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
