how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
