so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
