you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I am available for nakedness
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
