Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I don't think brook has ever known best
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize