I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Randomize
