You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
