There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
