Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I just googled if crying burns calories
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Randomize
