The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
