i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
