She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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