he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
