Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
