My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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