Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
