Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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