oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
