The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
