oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
