Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Randomize
