Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize