Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
