You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
They took my balls.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
