Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
