you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize