They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I think i got beer on your cat.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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