Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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