I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
