As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I supernannyed him into submission
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
