i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
