I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
