it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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