i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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