yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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